A friend told me recently, "I'm particular about who I share my problems with. When they don't know how to pray effectively, I believe they end up doing more harm than good."

Do you agree? Is it better to not pray at all than to pray in the wrong way?

James 5:16 tells us, "The effective, fervent prayer of a righteous man avails much." God took the time to define effective praying so we'd recognize ineffective praying, too. The word "effective" is the Greek word energeo, from which we get the word "energy." It means to be "active and operative." "Fervent" means "ardor, fiery intensity of feeling."

My picture of effective praying is a simple one. Dave and I had only been married a short time when he started coming down with bronchitus. He told me he'd had it for up to four times a year since he was about 15. I asked my 13-year-old son, Clint, to join me in praying for Dave. We made our way to the bedroom. Clint sat on the edge of the bed, picked up Dave's hand and said, "Lord, it's us again," and he went on to pray for Dave.

I had to leave soon after to pick up my daughter. Before I left, I checked in with Clint to say goodnight. He was sitting on his bed leafing through the pages of his Bible. When I returned home, Dave told me what had happened after I left. Clint had come back into the room saying, "Dave, I want to pray for you again, but first I want to share some verses that have come to mean a lot to me." Then he prayed again.

Dave was healed that night of bronchitus and all the nights since. Forty years of an illness was ended when one 13-year-old boy's effective, fervent prayers were prayed.

As I look back, I can think of at least three things Clint did to make his talk with God avail much:

Familiarity
Faith
Force

Clint spoke with familiarity to God: "Lord, it's us again." That means his prayers were not limited to when he needed something. My dad used to say that when God's people pray in the good times, He's close by when the bad times come." Clint spoke to God all the time, so it was easy for him to pray this particular time.

Faith. Jesus held up children as those we should emulate (Mt. 18). Whenever we struggle with the concept of faith, just watch children. They believe what their mom or dad says just because they said it. Clint drew from his past experience with God's faithfulness through answered prayers as well as His promises in the Bible. Experience from the past and promises for the future. Those are the things that defined Clint's faith.

And then there's force. Authority. It's not something we usually associate with a child necessarily. But Clint knew that because he was God's child, he had the authority to pray in Jesus' name. So he just did it. He walked in, claimed the authority that belonged to him, and forcefully commanded Dave's sickness to go.

I didn't realize that night when Clint prayed that God would use the situation not only for Dave's healing but for my learning as well. Whenever I struggle to keep my prayers effective and fervent, I remember Clint's example to demonstrate familiarity, faith, and force. His prayers availed much, and ours can, too.